Who’s the Real Boss?

The humans think they are in charge of me at work, but even a casual observer would know that’s not the case. But don’t take my word for it, I will lay out the facts of the case and you make your own decision about who the real boss of this operation is.

As I dog, I like routine, so since Doc and I are one of the first ones at the office, I start the day by going from office to office to make sure there is nothing left in the trash cans from the day before. If there is something left, I feel it is my obligation to eat it. After all, I am a giver and believe my co-workers should be able to start their day with a clean trash can. Much to Doc’s horror, even as a senior dog I do not have a discerning palate and have been known to eat Kleenex and other delicacies like bunny poop I find in the yard.

The next stop is to go visit the receptionist to see what she is munching on for breakfast. Just last week, she made the mistake of turning her back for just a minute. Thinking she was done eating her snack, I grabbed her turkey jerky right off the desk and ate it in one bite. So yummy! Doc was not happy to say the least and offered to buy the poor woman more jerky, but she was not upset at all, in fact, she gave me a pat on the head and told me how cute I am.

By 7:30am, most of the staff is here and once again I go in the offices as they are eating breakfast, sit patiently by their side and stare at them until they relent and give me some of their food. Now you don’t need to have studied Psychology 101 to know that behavior and reward go hand in hand. It’s interesting to see how all of these people trained in mental health have fallen for my manipulations.

After helping myself to the staff’s food, it is time for me to start working. When the first patient arrives, I greet them like I have been trained and then I tap my paw on Doc’s desk drawer when I know she keeps my Milkbones. After all, hard work should be rewarded. Then I push up next to the patient where they can pet my and rub my back through out the counseling session. If they stop petting me I let out a little sad whine to let them know not to stop.

About mid morning, i am worn out from keeping all the humans in line, so I take a nap i my favorite spot in the office behind the chair on my dog bed. even though I am dosing, I keep one ear open to make sure everything is going ok. You see, it’s also my job to make sure everyone is safe.

When the work day is over and we get home from work I still like to keep Doc on schedule for walks, meal and play time. If She is late, I let her know. Doc says I have turned into a cantankerous old dog, but I don’t care what she says because she can get grouchy herself.

The comedian Jerry Seinfeld explained the relationship between dogs and humans beautifully when he said, “Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them is making the poop, and the other is carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge?” I rest my case.

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