It is hard for me to believe that another year is coming to an end. Doc says it time for me to make some more resolutions since the ones I listed last year didn’t turn out so well.

Now don’t get me wrong, I had good intentions, but Doc tells me it’s the behavior that matters, not the intentions. Spoken like a true therapist. So here I go again.

Grover’s 2016 New Year’s Resolutions

1. I will come as soon as Doc calls me.

1. I will come as soon as Doc calls me unless I am busy smelling something nasty in the yard.

2. I will stop trying to wake Doc up when she falls asleep by trying to put a dog bone in her mouth.

2. I will only lick Doc on the face until she wakes up and plays with me.

3. I will stop biting and barking at the 8′ blow up football mascot in the neighbor’s yard.

3. I will only lift up my leg and pee on that stupid mascot when no one is looking.

4. This year I promise I will stop eating dirty Kleenex out of the trash.

4. Who am I kidding, I love dirty Kleenex they are like the caviar of my dog diet.

5. I will take full responsibility when Doc tells me I have done something wrong.

5. I will take full responsibility when Doc tells me I have done something wrong unless it is someone elses fault.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anxiously I wait to see my old friend;

finally a year has come to an end.

By the chimney I lay, curled up in Doc’s chair;

my present for Santa wrapped up with great care

 

But while I am waiting

I drift off to sleep;

Dreaming of dog bones

and other good treats

 

When all of a sudden I hear a big clatter,

that wakes me from slumber to see what’s the matter

I open my eyes to see the old elf

and my tail starts to wag in spite of myself

 

He leans down and pats me on top of my head

and asks me why I’m not asleep in my bed

“I was waiting for you Santa, I’ve waited all year,

I’m happy to see you and all the reindeer”.

 

“I’ve been a good dog,

as good as can be;

So you would be proud

and visit with me.”

 

That is when Santa

sits down in the chair,

hugging me close,

then speaks with great care.

 

“I love you dear Grover,

you’re such a good boy;

You help lots of humans,

and bring them great joy.”

 

“You’re the spirit of Christmas

all through the year,

you love unconditionally

without any fear.”

 

Then Santa kisses me

on top of the nose;

turns very swiftly

and up the chimney he goes.

 

But I hear him exclaim,

as his sleigh leaves my sight;

Merry Christmas sweet Grover

and a restful good night!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Over the past year, the place that Doc and I work has been going through a lot of changes. As we continue to grow, we need more space for all the counselors, doctors, administrators and support staff. That means acquiring new buildings, moving my co-workers around and hiring new people who I don’t know. Let me just say for the record, that I don’t like the changes at all.

What the CEO doesn’t realize is that since I  started coming to work as a puppy, I have a running inventory in my head about who belongs in what space, the smells in their offices, who rubs my belly, gives me treats and what toys they have for me to play with. It confuses and upsets me when he moves people around. For example, one day my friend Jeanie is in her office, the next day she is gone and a new person is in her space. They moved her to a new building without telling me. I just ignore the new person, my loyalty is to Jeanie.  No sir, I don’t like any of the changes one bit.

I decided the best thing to do is to go talk to the CEO since Doc has no say so in this matter. After I arrange a meeting, he greats me with a pat on the head and try’s to explain that the change is for the best so that we can expand and help more people. I get that, but can’t we help more people with my friends in the same offices? Since I don’t like what he has to say, I ignore him and start chewing on the corner of the cardboard banker boxes that he stores his files in. That ought to show him.

Doc sees that I am upset and meets me in the hall. “Grover, she says, sometimes we have to go through changes in order to grow. I know you feel sad about not being able to see your friends everyday, so let’s make a plan.” “We can take time during the work week and go to visit them in their new offices.” I lean up against Doc and lick her hand. It won’t be the same, but at least I know I will see them sometimes. Maybe it’s time to grow up and realize that life is always changing and that it’s not always about my needs.

After thinking it all over, I’ve decided to go and visit the new staff members and give them a chance. They might have something good to eat that they will share with me.

 Doc and I are already dreaming about next year’s summer vacation and have come across some interesting places we would like to visit. So, pack your suitcase and grab your passport if you’re not from Canada. Now you can cross one more thing off you’re bucket list as we travel to Torrington, Albert, Canada to the one and only Gopher Hole Museum.

For the mere price of $2 from June- September you can view stuffed gophers in a variety of scenes like making a snowman, getting married, at the beauty shop or on a picnic. Don’t miss the angry letters sent in by some people saying ” Gophers are an endangered species.”

You may be wondering how such a museum got started. Well, just like many ideas, it came out of necessity. Torrington was being overrun with gophers and they wanted a different kind of museum that would attract tourists to their town. Voila! the Gopher Hole museum was born. The proof that it is worth the drive is in the reviews. ” So funny I nearly peed myself.” remarked one visitor. If that remark doesn’t spark your interest I don’t know what will.

If stuffed gophers are not your thing you can head to Houston, Texas for the National Museum of Funeral History.  Learn about caskets, coffins and hearses. Then head east toward Philadelphia to take in the Historical Dental Museum. While visiting, don’t miss the bucket filed to the brim with teeth, pulled by early 20th century dentist nicknamed ” Painless Parker.”

Here’s hoping we gave you some good ideas for a family trip next summer. I know Doc and I will be marking the days off of our calendar until it’s time to leave.

As I watched the family planning the Black Friday shopping trip after Thanksgiving dinner I thought about how someone like General Patton would be proud. They must have been a little woosey from the all the carbohydrates and the tryptophan in the turkey because the trip they were planning could only been carried out by US Army Special Forces. Well, what do I know, I’m just a dog and so I just kind of roll my eyes and listened to their grandiose plans.

They scoured over those sale circulars like they were the map to a secret treasure. As Doc was handing out particular assignments for each family member, I knew things would deteriorate quickly. Now don’t get me wrong, some of the rules were helpful, like grab a shopping cart when you get inside Wallmart and don’t make eye contact with any other shoppers. But telling Suzanne to go to the electronic department while Jen goes to the toy section just won’t work. I have watched those two get sidetracked just trying to cook dinner.

After sleeping a few hours the family woke up in the middle of the night. With coffee in hand they went out to the mall, steely eyed and confident. I stayed home and napped off and on, watching a little football with the left-over cousins that were smart enough to stay home.

The bang of the back door and grumbling voices interrupted me from my third nap. In came the troops looking defeated, stressed and angry. This was not the triumphant return I was expecting to see. They complained about the traffic, other shoppers pushing and grabbing and not enough of the sale items. They even threatened to cancel Christmas. “Cancel Christmas!” I thought with horror. This calls for an intervention.

After nudging the angry group toward the kitchen table with the leftover double chocolate cake, they started eating and soon the sugar and chocolate kicked in to their brains. Before long they were relaxed and laughing about the day. Crisis averted. The one thing I know about humans, is that even Christmas can be saved with a little chocolate.