There is a famous scene from the iconic movie The Wizard of Oz  when Dorothy goes to the wizard for help and her dog Toto pulls back the curtain to expose the Wizard as a mere mortal. The Wizard tries to continue his facade and says ” Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.”  Finally realizing the jig is up when confronted by Dorothy and her cohorts, he admits who he really is.

Sadly there are many fake wizards out in the world and they show up in places we would never expect them to be. And even when they are exposed for what and who they really are they continue with their ruse, trying to convince you that your judgment is wrong.  Some people refer to that as “gaslighting”. Beware, because if someone is convincing enough they can make you mistrust your own judgement. It is a powerful manipulative tool to sow the seeds of doubt, targeting an individual or a group hoping to get them to question their own perceptions.

Just the other day I spotted a dog sitting patiently at the base of a tree. He was trying to convince the cat that even though he chases her every time he gets a chance, that this time it would be different.  That today he would not chase her and that they would have a wonderful time together. The dog even had the nerve to tell her that all the times he chased her it was her fault because of the way she acted. I shook my head as I watched that dog slowly convince the cat (against her better judgement) to come down out of the tree. Well you can guess what happened next.

Doc often tells me its important to listen to my own instincts and will often quote Maya Angelou when she said, ” When someone shows you who they are believe them; the first time.”

Photo by Angela Kirk

Human’s like to talk about self-esteem. I am not quite sure what that really is, but they discuss  it in terms of it being either high or low. When I asked Doc about it, she told me the easiest way to describe it is to think about a big bucket with holes in it. She said the bucket represents your ego and the holes represent the emotional wounds that occur in your life. “Some people have more holes in their bucket, some people have less.” she said. “People then go through life trying to fill up those holes by engaging in different things to make themselves feel better. The problem is that the things they do or the people they choose to be around are not always the healthiest ways to fill those bucket holes.

After giving that some though I asked? ” Well why would they pick those unhealthy things or people if it’s not good for them?” She became very quiet and then she responded. ” Come over here and lay beside me Grover, this may take a while to explain.”

“Grover, remember when you were being bullied by the cat down the street and some of the dogs made fun of you because you were scared? ” she asked. “Well you came right home and told me about it because it also hurt your feelings and you didn’t like the dogs in the neighborhood calling you a big baby.”  Yes I remember,” I said.  ” You told me I had a choice about how I could handle it and that being afraid is nothing to be ashamed of because everybody is afraid sometimes.” ” That’s right! she said, and in the end you decided to confront your fear and now you are friends with that cat. Instead you could have chosen to say mean things about that cat to everyone in the neighborhood just to make yourself feel better.”

Then I asked Doc what I had been curious about all along, ” So what kind of things do humans do to fill up their holes?” “Well that’s a long list, she said, but the most important thing you need to know is this, the only way you can patch up those holes in your bucket permanently is to work on fixing the problem. People often make the mistake of thinking that if they change things on the outside, everything will get better. It may make them feel better for a minute, but it never lasts. If you remember  this one thing you will always come out on top….patching up those holes in your bucket is always an inside job.”

Doc left me with a lot to think about.  So, I did what I always do when my brain is overloaded with thoughts.  I fell right to sleep.

Photo by Angela Kirk

Today I decided that I was going to make some big improvements in my life. This revelation occurred to me after watching all those infomercials in the middle of the night. Sometimes I  find myself so fascinated by the multiple ways I can improve my face, body, love life, finances and psychic awareness that it is hard to turn off the TV and go back to sleep. Being bombarded with all those images of change, it got me thinking that I could do a doggie makeover and not only feel better about myself, but that others would find me more attractive. As there is no time like the present, I decided to get started.

In order to keep myself focused, I made a list of the things I would like to change.  After “borrowing” Doc’s credit card, I placed my orders on-line. Thank goodness for same day shipping. The orders started arriving that afternoon.

For the next few weeks, I stayed busy focusing on my make-over, keeping it all a secret from Doc. I read books on how to Think and Grow Rich and Dating for Dummies. I put on wrinkle cream that promised to make me look ten years younger. I even consulted on having a “Quick Lift” but they said they didn’t do them on dogs. I told them that was discrimination and left the office in a huff, but not before I marked my territory on an office chair.

I was starting to get exhausted from all the work outs and changes, but I forged ahead. Some of my friends told me I was becoming so high maintenance that I didn’t have time for them any more. Thinking they did not support my dream or were somehow just jealous of me, I ignored them.

The last day of my makeover, while Doc was away, I completed the final two steps. First, I called The Psychic Hot-Line about my future. After charging over $100 to Doc’s credit card, they told me my life was in line with the planets, whatever that means. Then a dog hair designer came to the house and changed my hair style to match my vision of looking more like a poodle.

Doc walked in the door just after the hair designer left. The look on her face was mixed with shock and amusement, not what I was expecting. “Grover, What have you done to yourself?” she said loudly. After telling her about the make-over and confessing to using her credit card to pay for it all she asked, ” Why did you think you needed to change?” I then looked her in the eye and told her I must have gotten caught up in the hype of all those infomercials. ” They all made me feel like I wasn’t good enough.” I told her. ” That’s what they want you to feel, so you’ll buy their crap. You are loved, because you are perfect just the way you are she said, and don’t ever forget that.”

In case you thought Doc wasn’t going to make me pay back the money I charged to her credit card you were wrong. I had a lot of time to think about the whole makeover thing while I was doing the list of chores she gave me to work off the money I spent. And what did I learn from all of this? I decided to stop worrying about changing myself and focusing on loving who I already am. Not a bad life lesson for this dog.